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Monday, January 3, 2011

jUST A bITCH...........

What is it with deadbeat Dads...no child support for the 6 years it's been ordered for(over $32,000.00 in arrears...guess who's been supporting them?!!)...supposed to have his kids this holiday weekend..says can't take them Fri.(called 2 hrs before he was to pick them up) because he's working on Sat...excuse me?..does "electrician "work under the table..who schedules an emergency the day before?(New Years Day at that)...was to pick them up Sat. at 2:30...never called or showed up!! My poor grandkids were devastated that he "forgot" them..deadbeat lives with his Mom and step-dad..she always says how much she loves them..wants them to stay longer than the weekend..yet,does she call..NO!!!!..  we spent this weekend trying to help them through it. I can't imagine how it feels to not have a parent care enough. The other "grandparents..."..the hell with them too!
OK..got it off my chest!!...it will probably come back later.....deadbeat dad is always doing something that's just totally wrong!!!...if it weren't against the law,I'd just shoot him ..I know I'd feel better !!
Thanks for listening!!!

19 comments:

Lisa Purcell said...

My dad used to do the same thing to my sister and I and it is terribly, terribly damaging to them. He has regrets now and I forgive him but it does hurt them. Tell them he is selfish. It all boils down to that. It is not them, never them to blame. Kids that age think it is them. My dad is so sorry but the loss is his in the end. He can't get those years back now. He wishes he could. I wish I had had a grandmother like you. Next time he does it, tell them you have extra time for you to be with them and you guys plan a scavenger hunt or something really cool and fun. Make it a special day for them.
So, they will feel loved and take their mind off of him.

Ann said...

Lisa..thanks. We always assure them that it isn't them and we now don't "cover" for him..we just say we don't know why and that it's sad,but that we are glad they are with us. They,and their Mom,have lived with us since they were born and we are very close/bonded. We are working at helping them learn to verbalize their feelings about it..instead of having "outbursts" and fighting with each other when it happens. It's a SLOW process,but we'll get there.
thanks so much for sharing and caring!!! and, for "listening" !!Ann

Lisa Purcell said...

When he is an old man he will live with regret. I would't wish that on anyone but he is making his own bed. They will be okay in the end, they are loved after all. Maybe think of it this way, they will be so much more like you for the raising will be one-sided. That bond will be deeper. My sister's ex is an ass too but her son is a wonderful, popular fifteen year old boy who adores her and it is because she loves him enough for two parents or maybe three or four. LOL

Phivos Nicolaides said...

Very sad all these. There will always be people "parents" like this... My love to the kids. God bless them and you two who take care of them.

Ann said...

Lisa, thank you! :)

Ann said...

Phivos, Thanks so much my friend! kisses!!

Caio Fern said...

sweet Ann, yes , take this out of your chest ,
i know you are strong enought to deal with it all.

I'll pray for you . You deserve to fix it all.

Ann said...

oh Caio..thanks! you are such a caring ,sweet friend. I love you! I appreciate the prayers! xo,Ann

Amy said...

Yes. I love this blog right now, you crazy woman.
You. Are. Awesome.
He is an Asshole.
I am so happy to have 'met' you!
Xx,
Amy

Jacque said...

Hi friend! There must be cold? Here is very hot.
I do not know if the Google translator does the translation and I'm writing.
Thanks for visiting my blog.

Kiss

Jacque

Ann said...

Amy..SO GLAD YOU VISITED !! Thanks!! He is an asshole!! so glad to meet you to! I'll be back to your blog..love it! Ann

Ann said...

Jacque..hi !!the translation came through fine! yes, it is very cold here,for California in January! usually much warmer. Hope you had a lovely New Years!! looking forward to seeing all the lovly things you post in 2011 !! hugs to you my friend!!! Ann

NEEDLEWINGS said...

Oh Ann, I know what you are going through. Been through this with my kids. My EX only had to pay $75. a month child support for 2 kids! I mean, that didn't even buy a pair of shoes! Not only that but he was always in arrears and never finished paying. I was working 3 jobs to support them. The judge was easy on him since he was unemployed! WTF! Unfortunately I supported the kids, but they were raised by babysitters. My son is now 35 and daughter 33. My daughter especially resents her dad. He has had cancer twice and a stroke but she refuses to see him, so not only was he a deadbeat, but dead to her in her mind. I have never said anything bad about their dad, but kids know and will make their own opinion of him as they get older. Don't worry, in the end he will have lost a lot and will have plenty of regrets. More importantly, the kids will be survivors.

NEEDLEWINGS said...

Oh, and if you do shoot him, I will send you art supplies in prison. LOL

Ann said...

Hi honey! thanks so much! It's a wonder I can talk,i've bitten my tongue so much!!! I love your art..so hey..shooting him might be a double plus!!!!! hugs to you!

Vagabonde said...

I am so sorry to read this – for the children. It hurts so much and they must feel so bad about it. It certainly will bring bad karma to this deadbeat dad. I hope 2011 will be a good year for you and will bring many nice events into your life.

Ann said...

THANK YOU so much for your kind words! It means so much to me!

april said...

I'm so sorry, Ann. Yes, remember there are people like this. Who knows why; only thinking of themselves. Not caring; their mind is in another place. I do believe they will be sorry one day. You are holding it all together and your family will remember that always. Just give them all that love. They will know. That's all you can do.

Ann said...

Thanks April! I just hope our love will be enough!